Blog

Indigo Listens to The Dildorks!

10 out of 10
This podcast is great if you enjoy my blog posts so far. If you hate my blog posts so far, then this is better, I promise.
Pairs really well with a Shirley Temple. Bright, bubbly, with a fun fruity flavor, but will keep you clear-headed so you can hang on every. Single. Word. You’ll want to.
So, I was driving to work the other day listening to this awesome podcast, and I realized that I just had to review it. I needed to voice all of my opinions about this podcast and really soon. So I came home after work and I did more work. And then I decided to write this post.
The Dildorks is a podcast where Bex (of Bextalkssex) and Kate Sloan (aka Girly Juice) have “a dorky discourse on sex, dating and masturbating.” They open every episode with this description, and it’s a really apt description of the show.
The first thing I noticed is that this is not a podcast for education. It’s true, anyone in the vanilla sex community would learn a lot from their show. They discuss different lifestyles, different sex styles, dating, selfies, butts, self-esteem, anxiety. The list of things that you could learn about from them (as long as you’re fairly vanilla/new to kink) goes on for miles. It’s fantastic!
But what I mean is that this is not an educational podcast. That really becomes apparent during the podcast on Blow Jobs. In this episode (titled The Blowjob One!), they discuss all their usual things (both have extreme passion for giving blow jobs, which is delightful). Briefly they mention dental dams, which are not commonly discussed in blow jobs (or any oral sex). I was very prepared to learn about dental dams, which I’ve never used, causing a large gap in my knowledge. But they never filled that hole (hurr hurr).
At first, I was disappointed. Bex and Kate have a big opportunity here to educate their audience that oral sex is, in fact, SEX! And yes, it needs protection. They have a chance to de-stigmatize dental dams and finally discuss the uses and the need. Personally, I notice that most people don’t accept oral sex as sex that needs protection so dental dams rarely get more than a mention in any setting.
But then, I thought about The Dildorks as a podcast. They never claim to be educating within this setting. Though they both mention they enjoy sex education, the Dildorks is not a setting for teaching. It’s a setting for a simple discussion. I thought about this hard on the way home, and now I realize that’s why The Dildorks is one of the most important sex podcasts out there.
I look at it from this point of view:
Cooking is something that has every market in the world. People teach it, they compete in it, they openly discuss it any day of the week with no repercussions. The Dildorks isn’t setting out with a goal or political agenda. That in and of itself makes the biggest statement in our society. It’s not out there to be a message. It’s just…sex. Two people who aren’t white males discussing sex in normal tones with normal goals. They aren’t educating. They are telling personal stories with humor and heart. That’s more becoming than almost any other podcast I’ve seen.
There are plenty of podcasts that teach about sex, whether that’s discovering lifestyles, anatomy or just new partners. It’s time for something new, where people just talk about it.
(Eventually, there will be a competition for sex, which I would totally win.)
This show, in addition to being totally groundbreaking and extremely important, is really fun to listen to. Bex and Kate have a wonderful rapport with each other and it’s obvious that they discuss each topic at length, and with enthusiasm. I’ve laughed at a lot of their jokes, and I find myself wishing I could be friends with them. (Sorry if I’ve creeped you out, guys.) Their humor is exactly what I want when I talk about sex. When it’s paired with a great topic, a lot of knowledge and a complete lack of emphasis, it becomes a talk show, like any other. But better (because it doesn’t involve Kelly Ripa or that troll on the food network Guy Fieri).
This podcast has only one drawback (which is honestly small, and being fixed). Kate and Bex really dislike receiving cunnilingus. When it came time to do that episode, I could tell the heart was not there. It was honestly kind of boring to listen to that one specific episode. I wish they had brought in a guest or perhaps skipped it entirely.It was sad to see that they had put themselves in a box (to cover all sex topics like no men have before). Except for that one singular episode, it’s been a 100% knock-out show. I just hope that they don’t feel the need to be in that box again.
Let me be honest here: One episode being less than great is wonderful. I’d rather listen to that episode of the Dildorks than watch any show on The Learning Channel. I will continue to be a listener for as long as Kate and Bex want to talk to each other and record it for my listening. I will happy creep on their tweets, and try to be their third best friend through space and time as I listen in the car. (I also have lots of feels about online dating and they need to know, damn it.)

Indigo Moves Out!

6 out of 10 stars
Would only recommend to the strong of character.
Pairs well with a Manhattan. Because you’re an adult now.
Well, I’ve done it. I moved all of my physical possessions into a place that does not belong to a family member biologically obligated to let me live under their roof. It consisted of movement a few tables of various sizes, clothes in a dresser, a desk and a box spring/memory foam mattress. We accomplished this in ONE. DAY. Because my friends and family are baller.
This process is worthy of review for any adult. There are a few points to be made:
1.My apartment complex is some shit. This is because the buildings are old, which makes construction cheap. They claim to have put “millions of dollars” into renovations. I would believe they put A million. One single million.

20161025_201826.jpg
Look at this. Totally done at 4:55 on a Friday. No. Fucks. Given.

2. I’m paying entirely too much for this. I pay about 500$ in rent for the room I live in now. The complex covers no utilities, and on top of that, does not offer energy. As such, we must pay about 100$ collectively to pepco every month, and an additional 80$ to the apartment complex itself. This does not include 60$ to Xfinity for the Internet. 240$ for a three-bedroom place. Because there are gaps in the windows, and the roommates can’t understand how thermostats work. Which brings us to #3.
3. Roommates are terrible. I have gotten into a fight with one roommate about the closet that she should not have. I have been in a constant silent war with the other about whether or not she should clean up after her cat. Also, neither knows how to fill a dishwasher. The cups go BETWEEN the tongs. On the TOP RACK. IT’S EFFICIENT. WAKE UP SHEEPLE.
4. The neighbors are terrible. The walls of this apartment are thin (see #1). As such, when the empty apartment next door was filled, I was not super excited. I knew I would hear conversations because THERE WERE SQUATTERS before someone legally rented it. One day, my devastatingly sexy boyfriend and I were enjoying a night of sex, and we got a little rowdy. Loudly from next door came a “SHUT THE FUCK UP.” My boyfriend almost had a heart attack. I burst out laughing. However, I did not get laid again that night, and my rage against neighbors has never ceased. Now, one of them snores.
5. Being independent is AWESOME. I will say it again. Being. Independent. Is. Awesome!!!! I have not had any of my roommates call at midnight to ask if I’ll be home. I have not had either of my roommates stop me on my way out the door to ask if I can help with the attic. I have been able to buy and eat as much cookie dough as I want. I can go for a run right afterwards, or sit on my bed and masturbate with one hand, with cookie dough in the other. Like a curvy, vivacious Jabba the Hut. Wee pee bo solo fuck cookie doe.
6. Paying rent makes you feel like a boss. I mean, there’s that good week before you pay rent, where you run around going “Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit. Moneeeey!!!”But every time I look into my account and see $500 has been removed (presumably to pay shitty repairmen do shitty repairs), I feel like a big adult. I put on my adult pajamas and do a little IndepenDANCE because I just successfully paid rent.
So yes, moving out is a solid 6 out of 10. The benefits still outweigh the cons, and I hope that continues to be true for as long as I live. Then I will never live with family again, gods bless ’em.