Indigo Tries Eggnog and Rum!

8 out of 10
So it’s holiday season! And under normal circumstances, we would barf at the idea of putting an egg in our alcohol (unless it’s a gin fizz, then it’s classy and nuanced). However, once Christmas rolls around, we start popping eggs and cream into every glass of bourbon. Because its ChRiStMaS!!!
Now I want to make one thing really clear: I don’t like Christmas. I enjoy seeing family, and getting out of classes. However, I definitely don’t like giving gifts. I don’t enjoy receiving gifts on a specific day. I hate most Christmas music, and I just don’t like it Sam I Am. Peppermint is suddenly in every piece of chocolate. All of a sudden, everyone wants my cider and hot chocolate with fucking rum in it because Christmas drinks.
But there’s one part of Christmas I truly appreciate: Eggnog.

A glass of eggnog with nutmeg sits on a wooden table. There is the bottom of a small tree behind it, with two hedgehog ornaments and a star wars stormtrooper ornament.
I can’t imagine a more perfect setting and more perfect drink unless it includes a fireplace. The setting, not the drink.

I first tasted this drink as a child and I drank way more than was healthy. But it was creamy and sugary and delicious, so I wasn’t afraid. I insisted on buying one small carton of eggnog every year since. No one else in my family really enjoyed it, but they watched as I would buy one, and then drink it over the course of a week. Sometimes, it worked out that I had my last drink on Christmas Eve. Sometimes, it didn’t take that long to finish the carton.
When I first turned 19, I had been drinking for at least 5 years (because I am a hick and garbage). I tasted fum for the first time at a friend’s house. The night involved tequila, rum and Everclear. It was a good time, but I took that first sip of rum and was in heaven. I immediately knew that I had found my life partner. My one true love: Spiced Rum. So of course, I brought it home to meet the eggnog. It was truly amazing.
So what does drinking Rum and Eggnog feel like? Well, if you have ever taken a cloud, thrown some nutmeg on it and swallowed it whole, I imagine it would be close. It’s somehow smooth and bouncy. Yet also sweet and delicious.
What does drinking Rum and Eggnog taste like? Well if you take a bit of sweet cream, add some whispers of spice, and then just the tiniest hint of warm, soft cat belly. I believe that it’s similar to the taste of ambrosia. That’s why most people can only have a bit of it. They aren’t gods.
But what prevents this drink from being a perfect 10 in my book? Well, the short answer is that it’s heavy. Now, to be quite clear: I am a very big fan of heavy drinks. Guinness is my favorite beer. Hot Chocolate universally needs more chocolate. I have very hearty and rich flavor palate. And yet, this drink should be enjoyed carefully. Eggnog is rich and heavy, even by my standards. I can have a glass, but then I need a break. My cow-wife can only have a shot’s worth of eggnog (which leaves no room for rum). And as I have discussed before, when I drink alcohol with too much sugar, I will have a wicked awful hangover.
As usual, one recipe for you:
Indigo’s Favorite Eggnog and Rum!

  • Eggnog (most brands are good, but locally made is best!)
  • Spiced Rum (I like Sailor Jerry, Kraken or Sugar Island, but the cheap stuff would do just as well.
  • Nutmeg (for garnish)

Pour one shot (1 ounce) of rum into a glass. Add in 3-4 ounces of eggnog. (I usually do three ounces myself, but I like alcohol a lot.) Give it a good stir. Sprinkle some nutmeg on top for garnish (JUST A PINCH OF NUTMEG). Enjoy!

Indigo Tries a Washington Apple!

10 out of 10.
Tastes great but also will get you hammered. If you like apple pie or whiskey, this drink is for you.
So a long long time ago, I liked to hang out with some back-woods folks. I use folks with that spelling on purpose. They are (to my knowledge) about as cis-het-normative as a group of people can be. They had that simple country way of life where their kids drank at 16 (with supervision) and they hosted parties because parties are fun. It reminds me of the type of country where you sit on the front porch and look at the stars just because there’s nothing else to do. With a dash of city liberalism, and removing the racism/sexism/general oppression of anyone “other”, this is the kind of living that I really adore.
These folks had one favorite drink: The Washington Apple. So despite being on the opposite coast from Washington, this drink was abundant, and it came in a lot of different forms. Anywhere from pitcher, to chaser, to shot. So when I was 16 myself, I went to this house and we got absolutely plastered on this drink. From this night, I remember being kissed on the cheek by a “good old boy” who I would refuse to talk to if I met today, pulling a girl naked from the shower she tried to take, and cuddling between a cute girl and a cute boy as they fell asleep. These times hold a lot of conflict for me now because I’m much more aware of society, but these happy memories are in my heart and I won’t let them go.
And they have nothing to do with the drink. Back to business, Indigo!!
So the true and proper Washington Apple that I know is in single cocktail form. It begins with one ounce of Crown Royal, one half-ounce of apple sour schnapps and roughly 4-5 ounces of apple juice. The resulting cocktail has a delicious apple taste, with a nice kick from the Crown Royal. I imagine that you could add Fireball and make sort of a Washington Apple Pie.
However, my favorite thing about the Washington Apple is that this drink can easily be made in bulk, as well as into shots. Just by changing the proportions, this drink can be made and enjoyed by many folks, or it can be a pleasant cocktail you order by yourself at a bar.
This drink is smooth and sweet. Some say that it’s too sweet, and I think that’s possible. If necessary, I could see cutting the apple juice with a bit of soda water (not tonic water). This would add acid from the carbon, and also dilute the apple juice thoroughly. If you regularly find that ciders are too sweet for you (jesus, I like apple things don’t I?).