Indigo Tries Flirtatious Pheromone Infused Body Mist

Happy Holiday Season, Party People! This is the tenth post in my 12 days celebration! What better way to celebrate Capitalism than posting reviews where you can purchase these fine items with my affiliate links?

7 out of 10
Pairs nicely with a classic martini. It is the drink of flirts. Shaken, not stirred, my friends.
This toy was sent to me by the kind folks at SheVibe! You can purchase this particular scent, which is listed as Pomegranate, Fig, Coconut and Plumeria for about $14 (USD) at time of posting. Or peruse their other scents, which include Passionfruit and Guava, or Vanilla, Sugar and Sweetpea.

A bottle of the Flirtatious Pheromone Infused Body Mist in on a blank white background. The bottle is mostly black with a purple strip at the top, and purple font naming the scent as "Pomagranate, Fig and Plumeria."
Image courtesy of the SheVibe product page.

As a student of psychology, specifically focusing on relationships, I have been interested in pheromones before. Science focuses on pheromones in the communication of insects and other types of creatures because they are the primary language for them. Humans, as we know, depend less on pheromones and more on spoken and written language to communicate. In fact, it was thought that our olfactory cortices could not pick up on pheromones at all because they were so small. However, if pheromones can be detected, then they most likely do play a part in dating and relationships.
There’s scientific evidence each way. Since I am primarily a scholar, I looked to the research. I found that girls who lived with step-fathers were more like to start puberty at earlier ages. This may tie into the idea that someone who is eligible as a mate being around them is providing the types pheromones which signal a close mate. As a result, their bodies are stimulating the appropriate measures to become eligible mates themselves. There’s evidence that women who live around each other are likely to sync up their menstrual cycles. And there is evidence that placing pheromones related to sexual arousal in a setting makes it more likely for those in that setting to engage in sexual behaviors. However, when those same pheromones are placed directly onto the subjects, they do not stimulate sexual behavior. There’s also evidence to to support the idea that those with uteri are most sensitive to pheromones when they are ovulating. This is believed to be a method by which they can discern the best mates.
So what does all this mean? Well, to sum up, it’s likely that humans secret pheromones and that those pheromones affect the responsive behavior of others. However, it’s easy to override pheromones, so you don’t want them directly on your skin. You want them near you (such as a clay necklace smeared with the appropriate oils). Additionally, there has been limited research on pheromones and dating. We can determine the sex of someone based on their smell (though there has been no research around this with transgender individuals). Cis women are more likely to find the smell of a cis man attractive if his face is symmetrical.
So when it comes to bottling and selling pheromones, how is it possible to have them help you catch someone’s eye?
Well the short answer is that they can’t. But the long answer is a bit more complicated than that. When humans use pheromones, we aren’t sure what our brains search for. It’s still hard to parse out all the signals that pheromones can send. And when we can, there has been evidence that we search for scents that are least like our own. This may help us diversify the genetics of offspring. So when you’re looking to attract a potential mate, you want to smell as different from them as possible. That means that in order to have the best chance, we have to find the pheromones we do excrete and then add new ones that aren’t already on that list. But in addition, we can’t excrete pheromones that signal certain things. For example, excreting pheromones that are associated with pregnancy, or sexually dormant periods are not likely to attract a mate.
In essence, this spray, and the “science” behind it doesn’t work. There are no specific pheromones listed on the bottle, so it’s impossible to tell. Even if I knew what pheromones were present on me, I wouldn’t know if this added to them or just doubled up on one I already had. The product page describes the pheromones as “gender friendly” which may mean they just use the sexual arousal pheromone. However, that pheromone is often non-effective in non-sexual contexts, and almost completely ineffective for cis women on hormonal birth control.
So I tried it a couple of ways anyway, just to see what happened. I actually like the scent, which is listed as Pomegranate, Fig, Coconut and Plumeria. Fig and pomegranate are some of my favorite scents, but it does feel like a lot is happening in this scent palate. I could have used maybe one or two less scent profiles. However, I do enjoy it enough to use it. A few people I met really did not like the scent of it. I’ll never know if it was the pheromones or the scent itself. But I’ll go ahead and bet on the scent.
I did notice that after a while, my own scent changes. It never occurred to me that I would also react to the artificial pheromones I wore, but it does attest to there being some kind of pheromone involved. My own odor changes just a little bit, and I haven’t figured out if it’s a specific type of response or not. I’m one of a few people who would notice that because my sense of smell is so strong. I also don’t notice any other reactions, such as heightened libido, so the reaction is completely physiological and not strong.
When testing, I originally placed it directly on my skin with the idea that it would permeate like traditional perfume oil. I didn’t know then that my own pheromones would negate it (as the scientific evidence shows it might). Nothing really happened, and I didn’t notice any reactions from others. After a small bit of research, I saw a study that found placing pheromones on the chest of a cis woman did not illicit reactions from her or her partner. But when it was on a necklace she wore, it did illicit a reaction (though the effect was not strong).
So I tried it on my clothes like one would normally use a body mist. I have to be honest, I did feel like more people noticed me. I felt like I was turning heads a bit more and I was a little more confident. However, I can’t say if this is true or not. It may have honestly been due to a placebo effect. It may have been because when I used this, I was often going out to an event and therefore, I put more effort into my clothes than usual. It may have all been in my head, and I only imagined people staring because I wanted to. I also have to be aware that I was growing a beard during my testing of this, so maybe I was paranoid people were staring because of that.
Overall, I don’t dislike this product. I can’t say with certainty that it doesn’t work, or that it does work. The research around pheromones is still sparse enough for me to doubt that there’s solid science. But if it helps me feel more confident even by coincidence, I’ll keep wearing it.
This toy was sent to me by the kind folks at SheVibe! You can purchase this particular scent, which is listed as Pomegranate, Fig, Coconut and Plumeria for about $14 (USD) at time of posting. Or peruse their other scents, which include Passionfruit and Guava, or Vanilla, Sugar and Sweetpea.

Indigo Plays Favorites with Companies!

Happy Holiday Season, Party People! This is the ninth post in my 12 days celebration! What better way to celebrate Capitalism than posting reviews where you can purchase these fine items with my affiliate links?

10 out of 10
Pairs nicely with some hot tea. It makes you feel warm and cozy inside, and it can be a stimulating past time.
So a little bit ago, I confessed to playing favorites with companies and I worried that it might be unprofessional or give me a bias. A few people jumped in to say that this isn’t true, or if it is true, then it’s not an issue. So I spent some time thinking about what I do as a reviewer. In the sex toy industry, we are all alone. There is no standard way to do things, and there are often no laws or restrictions. Returns are not possible (or should not be if they are, because how do you deal with a returned toy that has been on/in someone’s bits). Who is advocating for the customers?
Well that is my job. I believe that calling out problematic companies is important for this reason. Often, people buying sex toys are doing so discreetly and they don’t have time or opportunity for research. If they don’t know their bodies very well, then they might not know which toy they will like. As a reviewer, it’s part of my job to be the researcher. It’s my job to know bodies and what they will like. So when I play favorites with companies, I am just doing my job, and that’s not only okay. It’s perfect.
So without further ado, I want to talk about three different companies that I have absolutely fallen in love with this year, and tell you why! I will try not to make this post too long, but I do want to emphasize how these companies have helped me grow as an educator and blogger, and how their business has helped customers in some way.
First up is Lust Arts. I go on a lot of Twitter rants about this company. I met them this year because they approached me about sponsorship for Woodhull, as well as some consulting things. This was the first company I’ve ever consulted with, and the first event sponsor to approach me. I was so flattered to receive that email. After having my consultations with them over video, I decided that I was in love with this company.
Their boxes are always a delight to receive. I have gotten stickers and chocolates and all kinds of other treats, which is frankly delightful. This aspect of their boxes was even something we discussed in our consulting call, and it was amazing how much information was shared between me and Lust Arts. I have since heard that they have treated others just as well, including paying others for time and information, which I find to be truly delightful to hear about a company. The personal touches are great as a reviewer.
The sponsorship deal included sending me one toy to review, but I was having a hard time choosing, and so they sent me both of the toys I was debating between. When I had received them, and loved them, I was sent a replacement for one. Not because I had any issues, but because they felt they could have done a better job with the pour. Their products are amazing, and you can read my reviews of them to understand how I really feel about the toys I own from them.
I had the distinct pleasure of meeting one of the owners when I visited Colorado this year, and she was amazing and kind. We spent the better part of a day in downtown Denver and connected on so many things. I will always be grateful to have found a good friend there, and I hope I can see her again this year!
Next up is Betty’s Toybox! This company made it’s way onto my favorites list when they agreed to send me one of my first review toys. I was delighted to have their trust as a baby blogger. Later that year, I pitched them a sponsored post, and they accepted! It was that moment that I knew how this company was helping the industry. They have historically been the most open to new bloggers and have boosted so many others up. To this day, I have running email chains with them. When I finish reviewing one product, they pop right in with another they want to send me. On top of that, they never push me to finish within a time frame. I will always be happy to write thorough reviews for this company, and I’m glad they let me do my job this way.
Recently, they redid their website to make it more gender inclusive. This renovation was spurred by a call-out for their site having labels like “For Him” and “For Her.” That’s right, everyone. This company messed up and they are still on my favorites list. That’s because they acknowledged the infraction and then they fixed it. I was truly amazed when I saw this happen. It gives me hope that this company will continue to grow and help the community in the same way it has these past two years.
And last, but certainly not least is Creamed and Sugared. I have written two reviews for this company so far. There’s a lot about them that I like on paper, and that is really why they made this list. I’ve only know about this company for about five months now, so I’ve been trying to play it chill. It’s not really working though. I was introduced to the company at Woodhull this year, and I immediately liked them because they were small and local. In addition to that, they were involved in a number of small and local events. This involvement in the community was the main thing that really sparked my adoration for this company.
Their website is very easy to read, and they include their own fun personality in every description. When you read their about page, you find funny quips and open personalities, but when you read the page about caring for their products, the focus shifts into the professional demeanor that is necessary. The balance of this is accomplished well, and I will always enjoy reading it.
Which brings us finally to the products. I have two products that I received for reviews from Creamed and Sugared. But on top of that, I have handled many more. In fact, I’m pretty sure their table person is tired of chatting with me. But I just really enjoy good craftsmanship! Their products by and large have at least two functions, both of which they will accomplish well. The care for them is easy. They also offer refinishing services for a small fee, which adds security to a purchase. You know that your toy will be taken care of and that is truly a comfort.
To wrap this up, I love companies who are professional, but with a personal touch. When the quality of work is good, and their websites are inclusive, I’m going to like them. I have a strong fondness for small or indie businesses. But I also appreciate a retailer that knows what this industry needs. I want companies to support our smaller bloggers and help lifts others. And above all, I want there to fantastic quality to the products. These three companies have so much of my love, and I think they should have yours too. I’ve been a surrogate customer, so you know that your investment isn’t wasted.
Today, I’ll pat myself on the back for a job well done.

Indigo Tries the Fun Factory Laya II

Happy Holiday Season, Party People! This is the first post in my 12 days celebration! What better way to celebrate Capitalism than posting reviews where you can purchase these fine items with my affiliate links?

7 out of 10
Pairs nicely with a Sex on the Beach. Constantly looking for the substance that is getting you drunk, but the base components are consistently good.
This product was sent to me by the kind folx at SheVibe.com. It is sold in Pool Blue (pictured), Baby Rose and Dark Violet. At time of posting, it retails for about $100 (USD).
The Fun Factory Laya II sits on a fuzzy dark background. It is sky blue, and crescent shaped. It is wider on one end to create what looks like a handle.
When looking for review toys, the top of my list is always Fun Factory toys. I absolutely love this company. My love for them started when I was in sex toy retail and their US East Coast rep came to talk about their unionized factory, their attempts to minimize packaging and the toy lines in general. There was some clear transference of my love for the rep onto the company. I enthusiastically recommend this company all the time now. I have found their products to be the consistent in quality and price. The motors are always rumbly, and the products are usually waterproof, which I view as standard needs for any sex toy company that makes vibrators.
The Laya II, is a follow up to the Layaspot, which was water resistant and battery operated. I never bothered to look closely at the Layaspot because I prefer my toys to be rechargeable. This reduces waste and cost for me. However, I know that being battery operated brings down the cost of toys, which is why Fun Factory has several options of that nature. My elitist views do not need to overwhelm this review, however.
So the Laya II is a small vibe that is designed to be traveler friendly. I will admit that I didn’t have sense of the size when I requested it. I was quite shocked to find that it was much smaller than I expected. The description mentions that the shape is good for laying on a vulva, or cupping balls during a blowjob. It also talks about easily fitting into a hand “letting it disappear into your play.”
Now, I’ll be honest. I didn’t attempt to use the Laya II with a partner. I saw two partners in the testing duration of this toy. One has their own vibrator preferences and the other isn’t a reviewer, and we were too busy having other types of sex, so it was never tested. However, I can’t see myself enjoying the use of the Laya II during sex just based on my solo play. This toy is small, and it does fit pretty nicely into the hand. But I’m not going to lie, I used the wrong side of it the first time I used it.
The Fun Factory Laya II on a dark background. It's set so that it rests on both ends of the crescent. The buttons are visible on the wider end. There is a power button, an up button and a down button.
I start on my clit with vibrators, usually. And I always start with just the side that vibrates, and work around from there, figuring out the ways to use it. Well, the first time I used this, the “handle” side vibrated a little, and it didn’t make sense to stick the buttons in my labia. But alas, we have now touched upon the problems I have with the Laya II.
You see, it’s designed as that handy crescent, with one end vibrating and the other having residual vibrations. The buttons are on the end that vibrates. It sort of makes sense because the Laya II is so small that your fingers can reach it if you’re using the toy as a cupping toy. But I can’t actually use it to cup my vulva the way it’s designed. When I tried, I got my hand covered in lube and Laya went for a swim in my labia. Now, I have large labia, because everything about me is big (if you know what I’m saying). So someone who is more petite might not have the same issues with this vibrator. But it is a common theme for me to test toys which want to go swimming in my genitals and I’m a little tired of fishing them out again.
So what does this mean? Well when I use the Laya II, I place the end that vibrates (with the buttons) into my clit and I use it. However, in order to touch the “go faster” button, I have to dig through my labia just to reach it. At that rate, I might as well just use my fingers to masturbate because they are already right there. Basically, the design just isn’t a good option for me. The Laya II will be another toy that gets placed into my shoe-organizer near the bottom and forgotten for this reason.
However, there are some good points to this toy, and the design works for some people, because the Layaspot, which has the same shape, is popular. So let’s talk about some of the positive points. The 8 speeds is a nice touch because I like a lot of power levels. I think that makes it a good toy for those who like it soft and power sluts like me. It’s also waterproof, which meets my standards. And since it it’s fun factory, the motor is nice and rumbly. Additionally, being Fun Factory means it has that great magnetic charging system that I’m obsessed with.
Overall, the quality of the toy isn’t in question. Fun Factory has once again delivered another vessel for their rumbly motor which will last for awhile, and meets all my standard needs.  However, I will question whether or not this was designed for fat folks, and my instinct is that it wasn’t. The Laya II isn’t a travesty. But it’s not for me.
This product was sent to me by the kind folx at SheVibe.com. It is sold in Pool Blue (pictured), Baby Rose and Dark Violet. At time of posting, it retails for about $100 (USD).

Indigo Tries the Lust Arts Frank's Monster!

10 out of 10
Pairs very nicely with Whiskey Sour. It’s got full flavor and it’s very iconic. Not to mention that one too many will leave you in stitches (heeeyo).
This toy was sent to me by Lust Arts in exchange for a fair and honest review. At time of posting, it retails from $55 to $145, and you can purchase it here!
Two versions Lust Arts Frank's Monster sit on a rock together. One head sits on the other's shaft. The toys both look like their have stitches and wounds to mimic Frankenstein's Monster. One is purple and one is white.
Lust Arts came onto my radar originally through Frank’s Monster. Someone posted a photo of this dildo in the sex blogger chatroom and mentioned that it would probably be a monster to clean (pun intended, as always). I agreed, based on the photo. Those holes looked so deep and I just imagined all the vag gunk that would inevitably live in there. When I was able to chat with the owner, I offered an extra review because I could NOT choose between the Unicorn Horn and the Monster. Because I needed to see how this would clean. I needed to.
I am happy to say this finally: This toy is incredibly easy to clean. The 100% silicone means it sanitizes with soap and water, and the holes being deep was an illusion, produced by an inner core of black silicone, which peeps out where the outer color is shallow (in those “holes”). The soap and water washes everything away fantastically, and this toy takes no extra time to clean, while also being visually stunning.
And as a sex blogger, I am not ashamed to say that I noticed all of this as soon as I pulled out the toy. Because these are the things I think about now.
Now, because I am a lucky duck, there was a slight flaw in my first toy (which was in the Orchid/Purple color). This one is a firm inner core with a medium outer core, which I’ll talk more about later. However, because this one had a flaw, the owner sent me a second one, which I requested in Classic Film/White. This one, I also requested in the Medium core with a Soft outside. I did this because I felt that it would be more natural for a toy to be softer on the outside, which is true for me. I also wanted to be able to review the toy in more aspects, so I just went one step softer on each.
Two versions of Lust Art's Frank's Monster's sit on a rock. Both are on their bases, so they look erect. There is wheat in the background.
If you decide that White, Purple, and Green are not enough options, then there are custom options too!
Now, the lovely owner also knows I am a size kweeng. So I received both of these toys in the largest size, the Pounder. This size is 7″ insertable, and is 2.75″ at it’s largest diameter. It’s a perfect size for me to struggle just a little on initial insertion and then firmly conquer. I have gotten into the habit of starting with my White one (medium/soft) and then moving up to the Purple (firm/medium). The softer one allows my muscles to acclimate to the girth of the toy a little bit at a time. And I love being able to squeeze the toys I use because I like to show off my core. However, the firm one matches my usual routine of abusing my body with as much pressure and fight back as possible.
This toy is one of the most unique toys I’ve used in awhile. There is a gentle curve in the shaft of the toy, that perfectly places it into my g-spot. However, there is a selection of texture up and down the shaft. The combination is amazing, because I love texture, and I love g-spot sensation. This toy works perfectly whether I want to insert it and squeeze while I use a vibe, but it doesn’t slack off on the thrusting thanks to that texture.
As I always will when talking about Lust Arts, I have to mention the sizing options available. Now, they don’t use words like “Small” and “Large,” because that makes some people uncomfortable. They use names like “Teaser” and “Moaner” and “Pounder.” At first, these seemed a bit out of place, but after some thought, I realize that I love these names. Lust Arts knows what they do and they lean into it. Those names are cheeky and not shaming. Now, I feel like when I see them, it makes my purchase a fun one, and I can embrace it. The most important thing about the sizing options is that they are there. And that paired with the color is what really brings this toy up to a 10.The white version of Lust Art's Frank's monster sits on it's base on a rock. There are many more rocks behind it.
I think everyone could find something they like about this toy. If it’s not great in use, it’s a masterful art piece. If it’s too big, there are smaller sizes. If it’s too firm, there’s soft silicone options. I feel like Lust Arts as a company has thought of so many things. And they have been so open to correcting for things they haven’t thought of.
This toy was sent to me by Lust Arts in exchange for a fair and honest review. At time of posting, it retails from $55 to $145, and you can purchase it here!

Indigo Tries the Lust Arts Unicorn Horn!

9 out of 10
Pairs nicely with a Sex on the Beach. I do mean the drink, but also the act. It’s a little bit magical and full of fruity goodness.
This toy was sent to me by Lust Arts, and you can purchase it here. It ranges from $40 USD to $130 USD at time of posting. Prices vary based on color choice and size choice.

A photo of the Lust Arts Unicorn Horn. It sits on a dirt patch, with wheat growing around it. In the background is a majestic blue sky.
This is part of my series: Sex Toys in National Parks.

A few months ago, I was approached by Lust Arts not just for reviews, but also for some consulting. As we know, I love to work with companies that are willing to pay and pay fairly. When I was politely approached by them, I happily sent my rates and since then, my interactions with them have been nothing but pleasant and lovely. It is rare to find a company so forward, transparent and willing to work with small bloggers like me (though I acknowledge I am not as small as I used to be).
I am here to talk about one specific toy; the Unicorn Horn. But I highly recommend checking out Lust Arts for any variety of their toys.
When I started blogging, I saw Split Peaches and the unicorn horns they make, but I wasn’t as excited about them. I liked them as an idea, yes. But they seemed a bit cartoon-like and I wasn’t as interested in the candy aesthetic. However, the idea was delightful, and I longed for a more grown up version of a unicorn horn dildo. Lust Arts delivered, describing their own horns as “high fantasy” and I cannot disagree. When I saw the Rainbow Agate color, I was very excited about the possibilities. But in the end, I chose the “Sunlight” option. The gold base is perfectly paired with a pearly white horn. This made my inner small girl scream.
Story Time! As a kid, I loved unicorns. I had a set of paper plates and cups that had unicorns on them for a birthday party. When the day came, I hid them in my room because I didn’t want them to get ruined with food. They sat in my dresser for years before they finally got tossed. This is how much I loved unicorns.
So when I saw the Sunlight coloring, what else could I do, but fulfill all my girlhood dreams of owning my own unicorn that would love me unconditionally and make all my dreams come true?
Well, this toy is certainly a new favorite of mine. I won’t lie; a good portion of that love comes from the novelty of having a truly majestic look to it. It’s detailed and angled in a beautiful way that reminds me of the novels I read growing up. However, this toy is also a really great toy to use.
Personally, I have the largest size because I am size royalty. The Screamer size is 8″ insertable and up to a 2.3″ diameter at the base. All sizes have the measurements posted for all toys on the Lust Arts website, which is another reason I love them, but I digress. When I received this, I was worried I wouldn’t be able to take all of the toy. However, I proved myself wrong quickly, and I genuinely think it has to do with the shape of the toy. The gradual increase of the diameter from .85″ to 2.3″ is wonderful for training. I have even used this in my ass, and as a result, I can take even bigger toys than before. It has the perfect gradient for stretching, which means I’ll probably use this toy for others as well, if I ever get the privilege of helping someone train a hole.
Now, aside from being a convenient shape, how does this dildo feel? Well I will admit that a few people may not like the shape of this. Some folks find cone shapes to be boring. Personally, I genuinely love the feeling of being stretched, so I love this toy for that reason. However, I think that this particular dildo has a better chance of being enjoyable than others, even if you don’t like cone shapes. The horn is so textured that it prevents the shape from being boring, even around the smaller end. I can feel the differences in the spirals and I enjoy using this toy, even if I don’t insert it all the way. If you like stretching, don’t be afraid to get a bigger size!
Because I love firm toys so much, I definitely got the firmest silicone I could. However, I also love how squishy this toy is, and I believe even the softer silicone would be a joy to use. Additionally, there is an option for custom colors. When considering the color, size and shore all come with variable option, this dildo is extremely versatile.
The Lust Arts Unicorn horn sits in a dirt patch right in front of a green tree root. In the immediate background is a stream. It's a beautiful wooded scene with moss and ferns.
How could I not? This stream was magical.

As some of my readers may know, I’ve been living on the road for about two months now. This was one of the toys I brought with me, and not just because I had to do this review. This toy is easy to clean, and easy to use. I even use it without breaking out my lube samples because it inserts so easily. Rest assured, that this toy travels well and will be coming with me when I travel again.
Over all, I love this toy. The aesthetic of it is a perfect blend of my childhood dreams and my adult desires. I love how it feels, and how easy it is to use and clean. I genuinely love the company that makes this toy and the owner is respectful and lovely to work with. I cannot wait to see more from them, and I think this toy has potential for a lot of people to enjoy it. And those COLORS.
This toy was sent to me by Lust Arts, and you can purchase it here. It ranges from $40 USD to $130 USD at time of posting. Prices vary based on color choice and size choice.

Indigo Tries the Sportsheets Divine Diva

8 out of 10
Pairs well with a Toasted Almond. It’s got a good base flavor, with a little added cream, and it’s plain delicious.
This was sent to me by my friends at Shevibe.com in exchange for a fair and honest review! You can purchase it here!
The box for the Sportsheets Divine Diva Harness. It's got a picture of a thinner torso with the harness on. The harness is black with a large triangle-shaped pad in the front, behind the O ring. The O ring is held in place with brass hardware in nylon straps. Behind this torso is another torso from behind with the harness on. It shows a larger pad for the small of the back.
So when I started reviewing for Shevibe, this was my first choice. I had heard some excellent reviews of Sportsheets in the past, and I desperately needed a harness because I had a partner that needed my cock in a major way. And when it showed up, I had to struggle to restrain myself from tearing open the box and put it on before I took pictures of the packaging. Divine Diva indeed.
And when I finally had a partner over, the need to use it was more immediate. So I took a few pictures of the box and I pulled it out. My first impression? I have a mass of straps and some cushions. Oh look, here’s an O ring!
I will admit to having some extremely silly moments in my life. I was once bested by a microwave. It was one of the simple ones too. I just completely forgot how they worked, but I’m not going into details about what happened. Just that an adult did have to come help me cook my cup-a-noodles. I was 19 at the time. However, when I pulled out this harness, I was really confused. What on earth possessed humans to think this was a good thing? It didn’t look like a crotch or underwear at all.
Well, it turns out that once it was all out of the box and laid out, I was looking at it backwards. And once I got it laid down, I understood perfectly. The microwave bested me, but this mass of fiber art would not! It turns out all those straps are extra adjustable and really, it slips on easily. For my purposes, I just put it on right over a thong (you’re welcome for that image). It was really easy for me to adjust all the straps and they were all within my reach. So while I was fixing it, my partner could watch and that was wonderful to feel.
The straps are nylon, so they slip easily. It didn’t take too long to adjust thanks to that. Although, this does mean it loosens easily, and I was afraid of it going slack on me. Perhaps I should tie a few knots in the straps for extended wear. However, with the artificial fibers, there is little to no chance of staining and there’s very little on this harness that could not be washed. I would recommend being careful about washing machines because of the brass hardware, though. I got a little bit of a mess on one strap, and it came clean with a little soap, which I am grateful for.
The Sportsheets Devine Diva sits on a blue bed spread. It has black nylon straps linking two triangle pads linked. There are black bolts holding straps, which link into an o ring.
So I wanted this specific harness because it was designed for larger folx. I’ve never been a fan of the word Diva to describe plus sizes, and that seems to have permeated the entirety of this industry from dildos to lingerie. I wish we could just say plus size or actual measurements. But that’s a bit of my pickiness. Details are this: This harness fits hips from 28 inches to 82 inches, which is such an expansive range. I was genuinely shocked to see that claim. It also fits up to 44 inch thighs.
I haven’t taken my measurements in awhile, but I have about a 44″ waist, and it worked wonderfully for me. The toys I use slip in easily, and it does feel firm against my body. Having that back cushion feels both supportive and comfy. Though I didn’t get a change to put my cock in someone’s butt (yet), I did get several really intense blow jobs. The straps did eventually work looser than before, but it wasn’t at a disturbing rate. It would not be inconvenient to have to re-tighten the straps during a play session either.
This kit also comes with three cock rings of different sizes. I love how much they thought of their customers with this. The rings change out easily with three snaps, but those snaps also feel secure enough to stay in place even with vigorous fucking. And the best part about this harness? The front panel can be removed, which means that a strapless strap-on can be used with it! If your strapless feels less than stellar, just slip this over it! So the amount of dicks this harness works with is pretty limitless.
In short, I’m going to use this harness a lot. I’m excited to get my dick wet with the newest harness adventure!
This was sent to me by my friends at Shevibe.com in exchange for a fair and honest review! You can purchase it here!

Indigo Tries the Real Nude Helio!

7 out of 10
Pairs well with a Schnapps mixed drink. It’s pretty tasty, and I would even say easy. But it’s really too soft for me.
I was sent this toy by Shevibe in exchange for a fair and honest review. Consider purchasing it here in Indigo (the best color) or Violet (also good I guess)!
A dildo sits in a plastic blister case. It is indigo in color with a bulbous head, and a suction cup base.
So when Shevibe offered this toy, I was originally not enthused, but I absolutely had to have this beautiful color because it’s my name, and I need everything to be about me. As soon as it arrived, I needed to take as many pictures as possible because I absolutely love this color. It’s by far one of my prettiest dildos in terms of sheer color. (Can you tell I’m a Leo???)
You eat with your eyes first, they say. And though that’s not really true for me, I will admit that I do fuck with my eyes first. Wait, no. That’s creepy.
What I mean is that aesthetics are important. I believe this is true for most people. That’s why there are such strong preferences regarding phallic or non-phallic insertables. This dildo is not too whimsical that I feel it’s pandering to me. It’s also not realistic. I think I would describe this as a very classy shape. It’s not assuming one way or another. It’s not too big, but it’s big enough to be felt. At 6 insertable inches, it comes in very average as far as length goes. Attainable, but not puny. It’s also a solid 1.5″ at it’s widest point.
Now, I want to point out that a lot of people have some issues with 1.5″ diameter, but you should not fear this dildo for that. Blush claims that this dildo is dual density, and I can confirm. There is a delightfully squishy outside to this dildo. My issue it the firm inner core. I feel that it is firmer, but it doesn’t accomplish what I need a firm core to accomplish. When I think of dual density, I think of products like Tantus or Vixen, where the flexibility isn’t noticeable. An arc at best bend. With the Helio, I can literally touch the base of the dildo with the head. I know a lot of people who would love the give and squish of this dildo, but it just frustrates me, to be honest.
And Indigo version of the Nude Helio sits on a Blush novelties bag. The dildo is thin with a large head. It has a large suction cup base.
Inserting the Helio is a pain because any amount of resistance will cause it to bend, which makes it difficult to thrust with any kind of force. Additionally, when I finally have it lubed and inserted, any thrusting at all will often cause it to bend in my vagina. Though this doesn’t feel bad, I don’t consider it a good thing either.
Now, there are good things about the silicone density. For one thing, this toy is the least threatening thing to ever encounter my cervix. I feel like in order to actually hurt myself with this, I would have to attach some kind of spike. Or possibly attempting to stick it into the wrong orifice entirely. Although if you have any luck shoving this in your nose, good job I guess?
Basically, this dildo feels like a beginner dildo. As we know, I’m no beginner. So this won’t be one I use very often. However, I see that there is a huge market for this. I would even say there is a need for this dildo. Something that is soft and easy to use would be helpful to folx who are new, or even have some physical trauma. Additionally, this dildo is a really great toy in the traditional sense of toy. I highly recommend sticking to the wall and just batting it around. When you’re impaired in any way (even just lacking sleep), it’s a great game.
I was sent this toy by Shevibe in exchange for a fair and honest review. Consider purchasing it here in Indigo (the best color) or Violet (also good I guess)!

Indigo Tries the Luxe Mio!

8 out of 10.
Pairs well with Sailor Jerry’s rum. It can be really nice if all the pieces are in the right place. But one false move, and it falls kind of flat.
A purple dildo lays flat on green lace. It's prominent head is visible, and the base is at an angle.
This toy was sent to me by Peepshow Toys in exchange for an honest review! It retails for about $26, which is super affordable! If you want to purchase the Mio, please do so here!
The Mio is a toy that I was skeptical about when I opened it. It had all the girth I could want at 2″ diameter, especially at it’s price. When I was offered this toy, I was really excited because I’m a budding Size Kweeng, and I want to challenge myself as much as possible. And I said to myself “6 inches is enough length to work with.”
So I received the Mio and opened it up. The packaging is fairly basic, but not bad. I thoroughly enjoy it when I can see toys through the packaging because it’s a sort of fearless, see-and-buy-this-thing, which I appreciate. I suspect this comes from my days in sex toy retail. I did require some lube to insert it the first time, but with a squirm and some warm-up, I was able to fit the head underneath my pelvic bone. The gods cheered for me that day. It may be only two inches, but it is an unforgiving two inches. That silicone is very firm, and there was no way that I was going to just slip it in.
A purple dildo sits on green lace with the head towards the viewer. There is an indent in the head from the molding process.
In the end, I was right and wrong about that length. If the Mio was 6″ straight out from the base, this toy probably would have been easier for me to handle. Thrusting wouldn’t have been easy, but it would have been possible. But the problem I had was the angle of the Mio. The base is diagonal on the toy, so that the head of the toy curves up (somewhat in an attempt to get the g-spot I would assume). However, the length that is lost with that angle makes it impossible to thrust with this toy. It’s possible that someone who has smaller labia would have an easier time, but for me, I often found my fingers in my vulva and covered in lube. Then there was no hope for it.
So I asked myself, how do I get that curve to work for me? It is a good curve. I expect in a strap on with a careful user, this would feel amazing in my ass. It would be able to get that base flat with my body and push the head where it needed to be. But without a partner and a strap on, how could I accomplish this? I tried putting a firm pillow down and thrusting my hips, but that didn’t work. I couldn’t suction another toy to it as a handle either. So what could I do?
The answer is simple: Insert the dildo until the base hits my labia (near my clit). This left the bottom of the base (and about and inch of the shaft out of my vagina. Then I pushed at the bottom of the base, which in turn pushed the head into my g-spot as designed. I was laying in my bed trying to figure this out, with my Doxy Smol on my clit, when I suddenly had a crazy good squirting orgasm. I had spent 20 minutes with this thing inside of me already, and this orgasm was a breakthrough moment between me and the Mio. It brought the rating up from a 5 to an 8 instantly.
A short and wide purple dildo sits in a clear plastic case. The case is sitting on dark green lace.
So if the orgasm was that good, and there is a way to make this toy really work for me, what is wrong with it?
Well, the length is still a problem. I can’t grasp at the base and thrust, which is my preference for dildos. Additionally, in order to get this toy to work at all, I have to jump through so many hoops, and that’s just not okay. If your consumer has to go through these hurdles, you should design better. When I use the toy in the g-spotting method, my wrist hurts and getting a good angle for that action is hard, especially for the time frame I need to squirt. This toy would be much improved if I could get a handle that curved around my pubic bone. Then I could rock the toy into my g-spot, which I would do with fervor.
To wrap this review up, this toy has a lot of potential in terms of partner play (I suspect), and the width is beautiful. The silicone is firm and feels lush. It’s easy to clean and smooth, with a great head on it. But the length falls short of being convenient, so to speak.

Indigo Tries the Queen Bee

3 out of 10
Pairs well with a Daiquiri. Loud, yet somehow still weak. Primarily unnecessary.
The Queen Bee retails at about $149. You can buy it from my friends at Peepshow Toys!
A grey hairbrush shaped vibrator sits in a black package tray with the manual (also black) beside it.
I was asked to review the Queen Bee as part of a Woodhull 2017 package (with the Sheets of San Francisco, and a Doxy). I was excited for this new toy, because I heard a lot about it. It was supposed to be an exciting new oscillator (though not the first, as they have claimed). The Queen had a lot of hype behind it going into Woodhull. I expected to acquire it on the second day of the convention, but I received an email letting me know there were some issues and it would ship to my door on the Sunday of the convention. “Not a problem,” I thought. It wasn’t too long of a wait.
To tide me over, I got to see the display model at Woodhull, and I was a little confused. I hadn’t made friends yet, and wandered to they displays in the blogger lounge to take up time. I was looking over the toys and picked up the Queen Bee. I turned it on, and it made this awful racket. I immediately turned it off and wandered away from the table, faking nonchalance, and afraid I had broken the model. I was also confused because one side was supposed to be intense and the other gentle, but one side moved and the other…just didn’t do anything? I said to myself: “It’s okay. The model is probably just being worked on. It’s new. The ones they actually sell are probably really great. Give it a chance.”
When I didn’t receive any update from Hot Octopuss for about three weeks after Woodhull, I sent a follow-up email. They responded, letting me know that I still had to wait. They were getting them ready and would ship out in two weeks or so. I continued to wait through retailers obtaining and selling the Queen Bee. I saw a few bloggers even receive their review toys from those sellers. And then, at the last minute (about two and a half months after the original promised date), when I had almost given up all hope, I got an email saying it had shipped. Two days later, I received the package, and immediately ripped it open.


Well, aside from being a specific shape, that confusing, marketed as “gentle” side still seemed to do absolutely nothing. So I looked at the photos on the website again. That was it. Their design was that it was the back of the toy and you could use it. At one point, while testing this feature, I grabbed my hair brush to compare. I rubbed my hairbrush to my vulva, then the Queen Bee. It felt the same. So one “feature” of the Queen Bee is the equivilant of the back side of a hairbrush. We weren’t off to a good start.
But I grabbed some lube and turned it over anyway, hoping that the main feature of the toy was enough to redeem the manufacture marking a backside of a toy.
I want to be clear about something here. I have known my current roommate for over 5 years. She knows about and completely supports my blog and my sexual solo habits. I excitedly show her all my sex toys, and she is used to hearing some weird noises from my room. The point to all this is that she KNOWS. She UNDERSTANDS. I still turned on the Queen Bee, turned it off and slowly moved away from it like I had broken something.
The Queen Bee is a type of loud that I can’t handle when I’m trying to get off. Not only is it loud, but it’s grating. I feel uncomfortable using it because I feel like I’m breaking it just by turning it on. Usually, when I use toys, someone is home and I’m about to sleep. But when I turn on this toy, my anxiety spikes. Not only can I not get off, but I feel like I can’t sleep afterwards.
So what does the Queen Bee feel like? Kate Sloan described what I now call the “Queen Bee Effect” perfectly (seriously, I was in tears reading that first couple of paragraphs). This toy feels like almost nothing on me. It claims to have deep and rumbling vibrations. Honestly, I’ve been afraid to turn it up at all and find out (the noise could shatter my old-ass windows). But when I hold this toy where I would like it to sit, it minimizes the movement (and thankfully the noise), and I will never get off. It’s a catch 22. Either I hold it feather light to my outer labia and the whole vulva gets a rave (with noise levels included) or I press it in, and I get some weak stimulation…somewhere…maybe?
I have rather chubby outer labia, and my clit is usually buried beneath them, but no matter what I tried, this toy just would not touch my clit. It was like trying to make two magnets with the same pole touch. Either my clit moved at the last minute or the Queen Bee would drop onto the bed and all was lost. All of these vulvacrobatics with a soundtrack of a garbage disposal in the background.
A grey hairbrush shaped toy sits on fabric that is gray with blue flowers. There are 4 buttons in a row, which have some small raised images to indicate what they do.
This is a photo that emphasizes the gentle side of this toy.

The buttons on the Queen Bee are also a problem. I can’t really use them and the Queen Bee at the same time. They are on the top, so they are accessible, but they can’t be felt, especially with my lubed-up fingers. So I have to pull the Queen Bee up to squint at the buttons, choose a setting that feels better than the last, and then reapply. All of this makes it impossible to use the Queen Bee with any type of dildo. It really just makes me give up. I’ll go back to my wand vibrators  and have a better time in the bedroom.
In short, I’m not in love with the Queen Bee at all. It doesn’t provide power, shape or accessibility. And all of this comes at a high decibel cost. For all it’s marketing and hype, this toy falls drastically short of where it should for the steep price $150.
This toy was given to my by Hot Octopuss in exchange for a fair and honest review. You can buy it from my friends at Peepshow Toys!
 
 

Indigo Tries the Satisfyer Pro 2

6 out of 10
Pairs well with a Tequini (tequila martini). It has elements of something good, but is so strong, you should only have it in small bits.
My friends at Betty’s Toybox sent me this for a fair and honest review. Buy it from them here! It retails for about $70-90.
I have heard a lot about this style of vibrator, and no one seems to really agree with anyone else on it. Some folks love the way it can force an orgasm, and some think it’s very painful. Needless to say, I think this style is different than what many folks are used to, and I’m fairly certain that you won’t know if you like it until you try it.
With all that said, I feel like I CAN say that if you like a lot of direct clitoral stimulation, this toy is probably a safe bet. But when I say a LOT, I mean less of pressure and tickling and more enjoyment of pulling, or even nibbling if you’ve gone that far. Essentially, I think that if you’re new to clitoral play, this is NOT a safe bet for you. Start with something that’s gentler.

A toy that is copper in color with a white nozzle rests in a plastic cradle. A box sits next to it.
The box is well-designed and classy. I am a little mad about how happy it made me.

The Pro 2 arrives in a really simple plastic cradle in a box. There is a white cord to the side. That cord is USB on one side, and a magnetic charger compatible with the Satisfyer on the other side. It’s advised to fully charge the Satisfyer (about 4 hours) before the first use. And those magnetic chargers are so flipping cool. I am a sucker for things that connect easy. So far, I have had the best luck with the magnetic chargers, and I look forward to using them every time. (JESUS INDIGO, STOP TALKING ABOUT THE CHARGER YOU DORK. [Not sorry.])
When I turned on the Satisfyer for the first time, I was a little afraid of the noise it made. It sounds a little like a raptor crooning. I made several jokes about it being a “clever girl” and applied it to my genitals. And this is where my jokes with the satisfyer ended. When it turns on, it starts at the lowest setting and if I put it against my finger, I can clearly feel the suction. I was really excited to find my clit with it and feel that suction. But…nothing really happened.  So then I had to press the other button, which is a different hard button, but under the same soft piece of silicone as the power button for whatever reason. It looks like a shitty volume button, and no, they aren’t clearly labeled. But I digress.
I said “fuck it, I’ll turn the thing up!” And I turned it up a notch at a time, cycling through the many different power settings, and this is where the story gets a little weird. The anatomy of my vulva isn’t so unusual to my knowledge. I might have some fuller labia than others, but my clit is fairly normal, despite my hormone imbalance. My point is this: The Pro 2 hurts me. And not in a fun way, even. I mean, I called it a raptor, but I didn’t think it would actually hurt!
The Pro 2 placed against me on the lowest setting feels like a tickle and I laugh at it. If I press it harder (because I LOVE pressure), it still feels so minimal. But when I turn it up, the suction feels like it doesn’t change. What does get turned up is the vibration, and my clit is surrounded by this circle of high vibrations. And it hurts. It hurts coming from the person who regular mashes their clit into pulp while masturbating. This hurts from the person who (sometimes) shoves a wand right on there with FORCE and LIKES IT.
But that’s not all. It feels like the Pro 2 puts all it’s emphasis on the vibration. Here’s this really great sucking sensation, why am I just putting a ring vibrator on my clit? That’s not creative. What’s more, it’s so pinpoint that it’s not great for me. When you pair these things with the fact that Satisfyer as a company claims that it’s products are “The Best Toy of the Year” etc., I get a little salty. Every toy company says this. When you take the one cool thing you could have and then downplay for something as overused as vibration, I get frustrated.
However, I do think the toy is a nice shape, especially compared to the older models I’ve seen. So far, I haven’t had any wrist pain from using it. It has a lot to do with that bulbous handle. So I suppose they have that going for them?
Basically, I’m not enRAPTORed by this product. In all honesty, this toy does get me off. But I have to somehow find this perfect balance of enough vibration to feel it and not too much (which causes pain). If I get too much, I sit in bed crying “Shoot her! Shoot her!” (More Jurassic Park references.) But if I get too little, I can’t really orgasm from it. The buttons are not very intuitive, but the manual doesn’t really help. For this much money, I expect some sort of guidance at least when it comes to using the toy, and I also expect it to not make wild claims and then focus on vibrations.
They can keep the raptor noises though. Those are fun.
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