Indigo Tries the Tantus They/Them

10 out of 10

Pairs nicely with a Budweiser. That may not be the perfect thing for you, but it sure as hell is the perfect thing for me and I love it.

There are two dildos sitting on a rock. It is two versions of the Tantus They/Them. One is teal, the other is silver. They are short with about an inch diameter. In the background is a bush, and a landscape that looks majestic and rocky.

This review is written for SheVibe, who provided me with the review product. It appears that the teal color known as Peacock is not available. However, these can be purchased in Silver, Blue or Pink.

(This post has been edited to include more accurate information about the renaming, which I had misunderstood originally. I apologize for the misinformation and will endeavor to not repeat such a mistake in the future.)

This post could also affectionately be called “Why I love my dick.”

I encountered the They/Them on accident last Woodhull when a Tantus representative invited me to look at some products. Like any good reviewer, I said “Yes” and away we went. I was intrigued by the Echo and the Paddles originally. I love large toys, primarily and things that I can be hit with. However, I noticed one dildo sitting in front of the television. It was not my usual type at all. It was small, not exceptionally wide, nor was it a very exciting shape.

And like a male lead in a poorly written television series from the 90s, who has just found the girl that is “totally different” and would “change his entire ideology” because she’s “not like any other girl he’s ever dated,” I completely fell in love.

Before I go on, let me give a little more backstory. I had just come in from a trip to Colorado, where I was at a high altitude for about two months. I was hiking for most of that time, and my physical fitness had never been better. When I hit sea level again, I was high on Oxygen for about a week. So I was feeling pretty great when I walked in that hotel room anyway. Just being high on pure oxygen and being at Woodhull once more. Bearing that in mind, let’s return to the moment that I saw the They/Them for the first time.

It was short and stubby, and a beautiful Teal color. It was unexciting and so lovely in it’s simplicity. I gasped, nay, squealed and I picked it up. “It’s so pretty!” I felt it’s smooth silicone. I put my fingers around it’s girth, measuring. I ran my fingers over the head of it, gently poking at the faux urethral opening. I felt the base, sturdy enough for the harness. I pulled a quick measurement from my own hand and it was confirmed. I had found the dick that would be my dick. It wouldn’t be the one I want to use every day when I masturbated. I have actually only used the They/Them as a dildo for my vagina in order to write this review. No, this is the dick I will attempt to put into every harness I place on my body. It is the perfect length, according to my hand measurement. It is the perfect girth according to my proportions. It is the dick I would have been born with if I was assigned male at birth, and it is dark, vivid teal. (I later found out this color was called Peacock, which is quite frankly perfect for me, and is no longer available.)

Reader, I am not ashamed to admit I almost cried in that moment. Later, I did cry real tears over my dick in my hotel room.

I picked up the teal They/Them with no obligation to review, but with a full intention of writing a post about how it affirmed my gender in a way that no realistic dildo ever could. This small hunk of teal silicone changed my life that day, and I wasn’t even expecting it. However, it was offered later for review. After hearing that the firmness of the silicone may have changed since that first encounter, I needed to know. So I requested it in silver. Though the silver They/Them is good- just as good as the teal one- I will always favor that first teal dildo which so changed my life that day.

But is it true? Is the silicone a little softer in the newer version? Well, I am here to tell you that the rumors are true. The silicone is slightly softer. I don’t think I would have noticed if I didn’t have the two of them to compare side by side, if I’m being honest. So that difference may or may not register for you.

Let’s talk specifics of the They/Them. This line was released and there was some backlash about the name They/Them. It was thought to be a marketing scheme targeted at non-binary folks. I actually had no issue with the name. In fact, I was enthralled that there was a dick marketed towards me. I am not a trans man. I am trans masculine, but not a man. So something being specifically centered around non-binary people felt wonderful to see. Though I think it came from a place that intended good, I don’t recall many non-binary folks actually having an issue. The backlash primarily came from concerned allies. So I’ve continued to use the name They/Them for this dick because it perfectly encapsulates what I feel for this dildo.  Some companies, such as Shevibe have opted to rename the They/Them in their stores. I have found out that this is due to SEO, which I completely understand. Shevibe uses “The Chubby/ies.” Each color has a different name. Though these names are technically gender-neutral, I find that our society assumes masculine in most of these cases. I personally don’t enjoy using these names, so I won’t. This toy will be called the They/Them on this blog, but I don’t object on principle to this change.

This dildo is small, like I said above. It has a maximum diameter of 1.7″, which is usually enough for me to scoff at. At a maximum insertion of 4.7″, it doesn’t make up for in length what it lacks in width. However, that does not leave this dick out of the running. The head of this dildo is pronounced enough to give me g-spot orgasms. I find that the smoothness is a perfect way to keep down on cleaning time, while also making insertion easy. I’ve even been able to use this dildo with folks who haven’t had penetration in awhile. Versatility is where this dildo shines.

The two versions of the Tantus They them are both sitting erect on a rock with a beautiful sky view in the background.

The first time I actually fucked someone, I used this dildo. The smoothness of the silicone made this dildo fit snugly into the harness. The base is nice and wide, which meant that my pubic mound was not hurt at all. The way it sit in the harness felt natural. It wasn’t so heavy that it slouched, but there isn’t a curve, so I didn’t feel like my stomach was in the way of my silicone erection. It is even short enough that it fit nicely into my partner. There was a question of whether it was too wide, but that was just an optical illusion created by it’s lack of length. It turns out that it was a great fit for both of us. I not only got to watch as my dick penetrated someone, but I also got to watch them orgasm around it. I was told that I “did better than some cis men.” I almost cried from such praise.

Now, when I have used this dildo on myself, I found some issues. The length means there is little to no handle with which to grasp. I have to firmly cup the base with my hand and the resulting cramps are not entirely worth the orgasm. As an aid from someone who has arthritis, for example, this is a poor choice as a masturbation dildo. This same issue happened when I was using it without a harness on someone else. So the very ideal place for this dildo is in a harness. However, all the rest still stands. It was easy to insert, easy to clean and the quality of the silicone is aces.

This dildo has changed my life in a lot of ways. I absolutely love how it feels and even though it’s short, you might like it too! If you’re looking for something that feels unassuming and non-binary, I would recommend this toy.

As a last note, I want to talk about Tantus as a company. I feel I may have mentioned this before, but Tantus has had a lot of issues around the owners and I always try to stand with victims. Impact over intention. I also hate the idea of separating the company or it’s products from those who create and market it. Separating art and artist only serves problematic people who want to sell their wares. I will not be unpacking every step of the Tantus incidents in this blog post. I was not a victim of them, nor can I speak to them with a lot of accuracy. What I will say is that people I know have been hurt by Tantus, or those who run the company. I love these people and want to support them. So I will not be able to say you should purchase a They/Them. I want you, dear reader, to consume critically and know what you’re purchasing, as well as it’s monetary impact. I received these dildos for free and it has changed my life. Not everyone has that opportunity. So what I ask is this: If you purchase a Tantus toy, purchase through someone’s affiliate links (even if it isn’t mine), and preferably through a retailer so that you can benefit people who aren’t just Tantus.

The silver They/Them lays on a rocky surface with the teal one just behind standing erect. There is a small plain in the middle background, and in the background behind that is a mountain side rising up majestically.

This review is written for SheVibe, who provided me with the review product. It appears that the teal color known as Peacock is not available. However, these can be purchased in Silver, Blue or Pink.

Indigo Tries ALL the Butt Stuff

10 out of 10
Pairs will with a spiced rum like Kraken. It’s bold, with a nice finish, and a little bit of orange lingering. Bottoms up!
This post was sponsored by Betty’s Toybox! Do me a favor and drop by their site to do some shopping for the products I mention, or others if they strike your fancy for other toys!
When I first heard about anal sex, it was on accident. Honestly, I made some joke about “the butts kissing” and my sister (who felt I was too young to be worried about) said “That’s a thing, you know. So don’t talk about it.” Well…not sorry little sister, but I’m here to talk about it at length!
I was inspired to write this post when I received a Pure Plug from Woodhull this year. I thought to myself “Oh good, I can review it.” I was getting ready to write that review, when another blogger commented off-hand that the Njoy items are reviewed so heavily and reviewing them doesn’t really have a point anymore. We know they are solid toys. So I made a pact with myself: I would only review Njoy toys when I had an opinion that I felt was different than everyone else’s (like the Pure Wand). In essence, if I didn’t have anything to add, I would keep my mouth shut.
This meant that I would probably never pick up another Njoy toy for review, which meant having to spend more money on toys. And then I remembered my own adventures in butt sex, and how all the toys were so overhwelming as I got started, and I realized two things: I should write about butt stuff. AND I could ask for another Njoy toy as a result. So all aboard the butt stuff train!
(A Very Brief) Introduction

Indigo's butt in black underwear with a silhouette shark and the words "Bite Me" on the seat.
Here’s a photo of my butt in case you forgot how great it is. Bonus funderwear.

Butt sex for some is a no-go. That hole is an exit-only and it’s often filled with feces. It’s unsanitary and generally gross to them. That’s fine, as long as they don’t yuck my yum, because I’ve been playing with my butt for 3 years now and I love the feeling. I want to be clear about this: If you’re cleaning regularly, not using insertables ass to mouth/vulva, then you’re doing great. The risks are quite low. Roll on, friend-o.
When exploring anal, please please please use a lot of lube and perform lots of warm-up. If possible, I recommend Silicone lube whenever possible. It’s the best for staying slick. However, if you have gloves, condoms (please use condoms!) or silicone toys, use this water-based lube! I have gloves and lube right next to my bed for exclusively butt-warming purposes. Because even though I am well-versed in butt stuff, even I need a warm-up for basic insertables. Please never ignore these things.
But of course, this post isn’t a how-to. This post is about the things that go into a butt, so lets just get started!
The Plug
When it comes to butt toys, the very first thing folx think of is the all-classic plug. It’s got a narrow bottom and top and is wide, but roughly symmetrical otherwise. This style is really easy to find, and I think that almost every company has that shape somewhere in their repertoire. It’s easily inserted, stays in place (for the most part) and it is easy to make. Because of this universality, it’s a good way to train your butt into something.
A stainless steal butt plug sits on a blue cloth. There is a sunset reflected in the steel and a brick wall in the background.
When beginning, if you you decide to go for a plug, think about the things you want in it. What size would be good for you? Does one finger satisfy, or do you enjoy having multiple fingers? The Njoy Pure Plugs are a classic for most folks. They have a lot of weight, they are smooth and easily inserted, and they are easy to clean. They are the height of luxury! But they come with a price, so be sure that you get the right size for you. It would be a shame for it to arrive and then it doesn’t fit, or doesn’t satisfy. I can’t decide which would be worse, honestly.
So here’s a disclaimer: beads are not my favorite type of toy in the world. It is hard to find a good set of beads that grows well, and also gives enough space to actually feel like anything. I have one set of “Hearts on a String” which I purchased because they were inexpensive and I could start exploring anal beads. So I hunkered down with my partner. I made him sit there and watch me masturbate. Right as I came, I yelled “GO” and he pulled. It felt like…nothing, really. I honestly thought there was a carrot in my ass that just got pulled out. Yes, it got smaller, but I didn’t experience any bumps or extreme pleasure from it.
Black silicone anal beads with four beads of progressing size sit on a green fabric. There is a crescent base with a bullet vibe inserted.
Does this mean anal beads are bad? No, absolutely not. In fact, I use them on my partners who are new to anal because they grow. It’s like having several different sizes in one toy, which can make it a great start for beginners!
If you like anal beads (or the idea of them), I did acquire this set of beads from Tantus whose shape I absolutely love. They grow with space between the beads, so I could feel my anus expanding and retracting as they were inserted and pulled. That stimulation is exactly what I love about anal, so these beads were ideal for me! They can also comfortably stay in my butt for long periods (for those extended play sessions). No carrots allowed in my bum anymore!
Dildos are probably the last toy I think of when I think about anal play. There’s a simple reason for this: I have somewhere else that dildos should go. However, I have experienced a lot of dildos in my ass during desperate times (read: I just need things in my butt a lot). So I’m here to talk about some different dildos that are useful for this.
I’m going to start with a regular pegging dildo. These are made for anal beginners, and I say to screw the label. If it goes into a dude-butt, it will go into mine. I own one that I got originally for my boyfriend, but it’s become a warm-up piece for me now. These are very often smooth and small for easy warm-up anal play. They are also (typically!) strap-on compatible because they usually are used by folx who don’t have a penis already.
A semi-transparent dildo with orange swirls is suctioned to the wall by it's base.
The Funkit Swell is a good choice for small toys with a big impact!

I have reserved a special note for the Tantus Super Soft line. I have used both the Vamp and the Destiny in my butt, with mixed results. It seems like a lot to conquer, but honestly, they just squish so well that my butt was really just underwhelmed by size and texture. I like a little more fight in my play (yes, even from my toys, sigh). However, I do maintain that these would be great toys for folks who are stepping up from plugs to dicks/other larger items.
Other Toys
A silver dildo sits on blue fabric. It's got one bulb on one side, and three bulbs of progressing size on the other.
I wasn’t quite sure where to put the Fun Wand in this post. I consider it to be small for a dildo, and it has this delightful set of beads at one end. So I’m putting it here under “Other Toys” because it is extremely worth mentioning. I had this hunch when I saw it at my old retail job, but when I talked with Veronica of Vulva, Ink., at Woodhull this year, I was convinced that I had to have this toy for my very own butt. Now, I do and I cannot stop using this toy in my butt. It feels amazing. It’s smooth enough to thrust with, but has a feeling like beads that I can’t describe. I would say that lube is extra important with this toy (and you should definitely get the extra slick silicone lube). Especially if you (like me) insist on thrusting. I have not used this toy for anything else and I sort of suspect that my butt has claimed it. I will probably never put this toy in my butt, honestly. If you love your butt, you should buy this toy right now. Go. I’ll wait.
As I said above, the Njoy Pure Plugs are a favorite for most people, and that has a lot to do with that stainless steel. However, I’m also a fan of glass for similar reasons. I need a minimum amount of lube, and it slides in nicely. Stainless steel and glass both clean easily and do not hold odors at all.
Silicone is great, because it cleans easy. However, since it is semi-porous, it can hold an odor, and I will often sanitize my silicone plugs to remove this odor. It’s as simple as dipping into boiling water, or mixing a 10% bleach solution for them to sit in. Don’t leave silicone in either for very long, and be sure to dry them and remind them how great they are later.
Extra Sensations
Vibration. I put it everywhere else down there, so why not in my butt? I just acquired this set of Tantus vibrating anal beads (mentioned above in “Beads” as well). My goodness, I never thought that I would love vibration so much. On my first go round, I felt that three of the beads was perfect. Then I turned on that bullet, and I immediately had to shove the fourth one in. My body wanted that vibration as strong as possible in my ass. I had one of the fastest orgasms of my life.

Weighted. If you’re familiar with kegel balls, you know that they are usually hollow with a weight in the middle that moves. I don’t know about building muscles, but I have the Fun Factory B Balls Duo, and I love this toy. I put this on when I’m just making dinner, because I love the feeling of the weights as I dance around my kitchen. I’m still waiting for a sir who will make me insert these and go up and down the steps with them. It feels amazing to do this on my own, and I suspect the show would be good for watching.
However, this isn’t something that feels great during masturbation. There just isn’t enough pelvic movement for that. Perhaps it’s better during partnered play, but I don’t have a partner to test that with right now.
Thrusting. For me, the important part of anal play is the stimulation of my sphincter. That means that thrusting is the most amazing. As I mentioned above, the Fun Wand is the best toy for this. Other smooth dildos would certainly be a good choice, though lacking interest for me. I recommend the Tantus Super Soft line for beginner butt-thrusters. Their giving silicone allows for a really easy feeling as they move.
How Butt Stuff Helps
Story time! When I discovered my gender, I was sad about a lot of things. I was sad that I lived in confusion for so long. I was sad that I didn’t have a penis I could attach and feel. But I was also sad I didn’t have a prostate. No boy would ever put his finger in me and feel that spot and make me have amazing orgasms. Or so I thought.
It’s weird, but the most helpful thing for my gender is using the Njoy Pure Wand in my butt. I will never have a prostate (unless science advances A LOT in the next few decades), but with this toy, I can feel it on my g-spot through the vaginal wall. I’ve even squirted from this! So when I have a lot of gender feels, I sit down with my Pure Wand and pretend I’m a handsome boi getting fucked good.
I also know many people who can use butt stuff to fulfill mostly impossible fantasies. I saved this one for last because it’s my surprise favorite. As I browsed the butt stuff category at Betty’s Toybox, I found the Crystal Delights Pony Tail. It was pretty, and it came attached to a plug. I added it to the list because I realized that butt stuff doesn’t just feel good. It can make fantasies real. This can go for pony tails, dog tails, bunny tails even. When you can place an item in your body that makes a scene come alive for you, that’s amazing. When you feel more like yourself with or without a partner, that’s amazing. For my part, I braided a bridle out of lovely ribbon, and I’ve got my pony plug in hand. It’s glass, it’s pretty, and I’m really in the moment.
A glass butt plug with an attached curly tail sits on a green dish. There is a brick wall with Ivy in the background.
I hope you enjoyed my stories and this guide! Go out there and fulfill your wildest, butt-filled (and butt-filling) dreams!
This post was sponsored by Betty’s Toybox! Do me a favor and drop by their site to do some shopping for the products I mentioned, or other toys if they strike your fancy!