10 out of 10
Pairs well with late nights and strong coffee. When you get to the bottom of something, you need both of those.
Recently, I have been having a lot of orgasms, thanks to the miracle of testosterone. Not only do I always want sex, but I commonly use sex as stress relief because apparently, I physiologically can’t cry anymore. Like, the emotions are there, but the release isn’t? This is fine. I’m fine.
But it inspired me to research ejaculation in bodies with vulvae, because that is not a subject that is often talked about. When it is talked about, there’s a lot of discussion about “controversy.” Because I am a student and a scholar, I have finally done some solid research in the databases available to me and I have found several scientific articles and studies relating to female ejaculation, and as a bonus, I’ll also discuss the Grafenburg Spot (G-Spot).
Let me start with my personal adventure. I have often been described as “juicy” by my partners. I produce a lot of natural lubricant and when I orgasm, I often ejaculate or “squirt.” Let me tell you, waterproof sheets saved my life. I began to hear the words G-Spot and squirting when I worked at a sex shop. I was curious about this, so I did some fast internet research. I found that it is somewhat common, but not everyone does this. I felt a bit lucky because it came up in porn so much, and I assumed it was desirable. It is actually a pain to deal with because I kept ruining sheets. My laundry stacked up fast.
After becoming a blogger and really exploring my body with new toys, I realized that this “squirting” thing wasn’t new to me and I had been doing big orgasms this whole time. So I began to lean into this concept of using layers of towels, and I started using my Pure Wand with more excitement. In those moments when I really need a good cry, I’d reach for my Pure Wand and fuck myself until I was dehydrated from squirting. It wears me out and gives me a cathartic release that normally, yelling into a pillow in agony would. Thank the gods for this cathartic release.
So what does ejaculation feel like? Well, instead of feeling the stimulation in my labia or clit, I often feel it deeper and…higher? Like instead of crotch feeling good, the area within my pubic mound feels good. It can sometimes be almost painful, but I like the intensity. When I orgasm from G-Spot stimulation, I am almost guaranteed to squirt. Well, to be honest, I gush, really. It sometimes projects out, but that is usually helped with thrusting. Normally, it just sort of rushes like a tiny waterfall. A twaterfall, if you will. Instead of tingling and pulling up, I feel a push down and my whole body tenses deeply.
Sometimes, my ejaculate is odorless and cloudy. Sometimes, it smells a bit like urine, or even just how my vagina smells that day. I don’t worry about what it smells like, beyond just checking in with my body. If it smells really bad, then I worry I have an infection, but if it’s just a little bit like pee, I’m not worried. After all, I know that ejaculate does void through the urethra, so it makes sense that it would smell a bit like urine, which also voids that way.
So I experience this. Big deal, right? WRONG. Here’s the truth: there are many many people with vulvae that experience the same thing! I consistently hear about many people who quirt, whose G-Spots swell during sex, who can’t orgasm without stimulation there. So it’s not just me. And the sample size is not small, despite what people say.
So I turned to the research. There is surprisingly little on this phenomenon, which doesn’t surprise me. There is research enough to confirm it might exist. The only reason to research would be to understand it better, which isn’t tied to life-saving science, but social justice science. Most of the studies around sex are related to bodies with penises, and in order for this to be studied, it would shift the focus, which removes privilege. As a result, the studies aren’t funded. It’s “not important” according to the powers that be. This is my personal opinion, but I’m willing to bet that I’m not alone in this train of thought.
Though there are many studies that say female ejaculation is real and the G-Spot has plausible evidence to be investigated, there are still people saying that it isn’t real. And to have my experiences (and many others’) invalidated is wrong. You can’t tell me that so many people with vulvae just don’t know their bodies or just don’t understand sex. I have sex a lot. And I know my body well enough to know you are the one who is wrong. My purchase of a sex sheet is NOT in vain.
Here’s what the science actually says. The Kamasutra mentions “when she feels him moving in a certain spot inside her, the pleasure of that touch makes her eyes whirl around in a circle.” So there is a clear space in the vagina that is arguably more sensitive or responsive. Well that makes sense because the vagina is surrounded by many different organs, glands and nerve paths. However, it has been consistently found by many people in the same general area. So there’s a historical context for the G-Spot existing, at least for some.
In 1981, a gynecologist named Martin Weisberg at a conference heard about female ejaculation and didn’t believe it. He went to the speakers of the panel and asked if it was true. They not only confirmed it, but showed him some subjects who were willing to demonstrate in person. It was so compelling that he later wrote a note in The Journal of Sex Research about how gynecologists were not helping their clients if they didn’t know about ejaculation. He went so far as to posit that in the future, there would be laughter about the debate of female ejaculation. I can only hope, my friend.
In 1981, there was another paper published regarding a case study, which means just one person. Addeigo and company studied a woman who consistently released fluid when she had sex with her husband. They wanted to know what it was and if it could be related to the G-Spot. So they manually stimulated her G-Spot and she ejaculated as a response. This was in a controlled environment with similar stimulation each time. They gathered the fluid and studied it’s contents. They found that though it had some similar components to urine (urea, glucose, cretinine), it was largely Prostatic Acid Phosphatase. This chemical literally has “prostate” in the name. Which means it’s not a primary ingredient in urine. Later, it was hypothesized that this fluid comes from a series of glands that are biologically analogous to the prostate in typical penis-owners. This is why the G-Spot is sometimes called “the female prostate.” You can get out with your over-simplified, gendered bullshit.
So if these people see it, where’s the counterarguments? In my research, I found one article which I could access that had creative scientific counterpoints. It was written by a Terence Hines. In this one article, Hines mentioned a lack of historical mention of the G-Spot (which I have already disproved in my discussing the Kamasutra. This same article also discusses how there is a lack of scientific studies around the G-Spot. Those which exist are primarily anecdotal often has small sample sizes. Well, most phenomenon were stories before they were studies. How about we get some proper funding, and proper scientists on this, eh?
His last argument was regarding nerve endings. Hines discusses the lack of nerve endings around the vagina, which means it’s unlikely that it will be a center of deep sensations which many people with vulvae describe. Except so many people describe the sensation as deeper and not the same as other stimulation. So I hate to break it to you, Hines, but you’re looking for nerve endings in the wrong spot.
Basically, we just need to listen to people with vulvae. We know our own bodies. Even if the scientists get funding and prove the G-Spot doesn’t exisit, would you use that as an excuse to not pleasure someone in a way they enjoy? Do you really feel the need to be right over the desire to please a partner? Why?
This post was written in collaboration with Sheets of San Francisco. The research was my own work and opinions are my own. These sheets have been my best toy, which I use every time I masturbate. If you also squirt, or want to, pick some up.
10 out of 10